Neanderthal Rock

[soymilk!]

train stop fuck the system and train hop /
smash the state and over throw whoever's ontop /
i'm working for the counter culture movement to build a community /
emcees, brakers, punx and grafftti heads come together like unity /
sires brake a b-boy's groove when the cops show up and act uneasy /
i'm just a kid throwing down and making sure his verses are tight and breezy /
make these stories sound like fables /
duck falty ass major lables /
keeping what i have real, stay true to my roots and the underground /
it's why i'm still here holding it down and perfecting the sound /
so you and your friends can bet that i'll be around /
own you and make you want to quit by chance /
like you're bustin' a C3-P0 wack robot dance /
spit what i've got and watch it explode here like i'm a c4 /
tell the chump who's battling me sucker's done for /
complex like multi avalon processors in c-dos or unix code /
fire back like i'm in high-bandwith transfer mode /
while i'm transmitting a message of data that's vital /
not for apathetic posers who stay idle /
this is for the radicals and such, my friends aint down with flakes /
speak of our logic and see if you've got what it takes /
i'll be right here stompin' fakes /

[soymilk!]

links links links
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...34#post2673734
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...71#post2673771

[soymilk!]

bump

[T-H-C]

this was a pretty good verse. the structure was great, and your rhyming was also a stand out in this, but it could be improved upon awhole lot. most of this at a good level. i would say that you can improve alittle more on your vocabulary and add some better punchlines. overall i would say this was a 7/10, just stay consistent and reach higher levels to become better. good job and keep at it...

[soymilk!]

this was a pretty good verse. the structure was great, and your rhyming was also a stand out in this, but it could be improved upon awhole lot. most of this at a good level. i would say that you can improve alittle more on your vocabulary and add some better punchlines. overall i would say this was a 7/10, just stay consistent and reach higher levels to become better. good job and keep at it...

thanks ace, i'll keep that in mind