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Thread: Wasted Drunk

  1. #1
    Evolve FanTa ZeE's Avatar
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    Wasted Drunk

    Swaying images, mixed up pixels fading into blurs, I cover my ears with drunken limbs,
    But this murmering still occurs,
    A buzzing in my brain humming with the sounds of being sick, leaning over towards the concrete
    Stomach rises to a fresh pile of vomit,
    Why did I do it? Surface spinning, flitting by are the bleary sillhoettes of those who still have useage of their eyes,
    Try to pull myself together, resting my lolling head on shaking knees, as liquid dribbles from my lower lip like I have a weird disease,
    How long will these side effects hold out? How long must I wait before I can sieze
    A stronghold up from the pavement that will lift me off these weary knees?
    Spitting out deluded comments, to ears that only laugh and critisise,
    And scorn my helpless state of mind before my hazy eyes!
    And in a moment of embarrassment I scream with utter frustration of not being able to force out sentences that comprehend fuzzy imagination.
    Topic of humiliation, stained in stale juices laced with acid, the remainder of the alcohol that my concentrated liver did forbid,
    Bleeding from the aftermath of falling to the ground as at once I lost my footing, as I tried in vain to stumble round,
    In drunken bounds, I zig zag dangerously, across a crowded street, where the adults stop and stare in both horror and disbelief,
    My eyelids are growing heavy now, the desperate need for sleep, too far to walk to a place of comfort, I’ll find my own out on the street,
    Collapse into the gutter like a despairing drug abuser without his vital aid of fix, a hopeless, drunken loser.
    A failure no stable future for a waste of space, pain chronic, clinging to her lower abdomen in a struggle to stop the vomit,
    Yellow rings round young eyes, prematurely aged, demonic, the extremity of evil…nothing but a teenage alcoholic.
    Def Poets

  2. #2
    Fear Before The March Foreshadow's Avatar
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    This was a nice piece it had alot of good imagery. I thought that some of the lines were a little to long but still this was a good piece.

  3. #3
    poyzonivey
    Guest
    I also think this is a good piece. To take up on a habit upon realization you write a poem about it, is always cool. I dont drink but i can feel your pain lol just by the way you talk about it. I agree with foreshadow tho the way the lines are written could be reworked a lil but overall it was nice

  4. #4
    Evolve FanTa ZeE's Avatar
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    thanks for replys can i get more?
    Def Poets

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