A Disciple's Thread

[Candy]

respect

[A Disciple]

@Candy sorry I was going off and it's not that I'm new to this ish... the pins, tugs, or water splashes... it's just that about 8 years ago it became abusive and I'm not with all that...

[A Disciple]

So like on that sick they implanted... I felt my heart down there, while they were saying my enemy who I thought abused me up there, then saying to me see you like it!!!! That's when I took the knife to my wrist and then they told me to go to the people that were doing it for help... NOPE!!!! Like how does that type of split happen any way? And like
@Candy are you familiar with alternative practices cause really I'm not and am kinda clueless how to secure myself and my body type.

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The sexual abuse when the TV said crazy like 40 times? I felt tied down and was having sex with my bf and couldn't move or push him off me when they were saying sister, cousin, brother, mother, etc... Last time I had sex they was still on that but I know not just don't know how to just phase them out. Like specifically I don't wanna be psychic - I don't want any random abusive stranger to be able to connect to me like that or talk to me like that. Or stalk me like that, or abuse me like that... like I have a family circle I love that would never hurt me - I don't know if they know or if they know how I protect myself from magic and split shit when I'm not even a witch to begin with and don't want to be. Ain't no way in hell am I going to side with the people who were closest to me and did it all to me to begin with. They call themselves masters of manipulation and now I see why. That's not something to be proud of dumb ass bitches.

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But tap, hit to the throat, head ache, kiss hands... like Oh my mother fucking god can we just get to real for a second!!!!! I'm never going to trust some stranger on my body unless I know who it is and like...

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I trusted my God and I felt so betrayed I wasn't protected... so I took prior advice from like 15-20 years ago and read the Quran. Which actually helped me to understand my own religion too... and I made promises I will keep to My God I just don't understand why there is one on me that is so abusive for real and won't take NO for answer.

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it feels like when they jump to you it puts you in hell or trouble for and with them... I don't want to feel like anybody but myself though... with a select few that I can tolerate and trust.

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I don't know how else to explain it and for real have nothing to hide either... and like... some low level "pawns" aren't going to hold me up and drag me thru the sludge for them either. And I don't value anyones life as a pawn until they devalued it as so by doing some dumb coward ass shit like this. Nobody likes me... I laugh at that song... do I care? Depends on who and it's like all the secrets and rumors or what I did and didn't do... like nah someone HAS TO BE LYING on me cause I ain't do shit to begin with. And like... I used to have friends and it seem like every time someone get mad at me they so mad they won't even tell me why... that's disrespect in itself too and like... I see now the strange shit that's been going on for years - just when did I get considered to be just some punk?

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I need to be ME in MY environment and zone going thru this so I can handle it... I'm just trying to figure out how ME all the sudden ends up in some circle that isn't even and never was mine. Keep that shit bitch... solve your own issues hoe

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I want the best case scenario for me, my family, and the ones involved that I still respect. But nah I'm not going to sit here and feel like some shit on my shoulders that I did wrong when it really has nothing to do with me and something I'm dead against too.

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Like me and Rio were getting cool, he was inside my HOME before... I get out the hospital to call him he on some fuck you bitch and for weeks maybe even a month later I tried calling to ask what the fuck he even mad at me for to begin with. I DID NOTHING TO HIM... but seriously - it happens all the time and for years. Maybe if people would just spit the shit out and speak we can solve it.

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Rule number 1, if you have to keep it a secret you probably shouldn't be doing it. Rule number 2, don't do anything you can't admit to (my sister knows my rules and cracks up and forbids me from seeing Fight Club)

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I'm dealing with too much already on this mental ill shit... I don't need the extra for real and like it's been cruel and abusive to the extreme and like I bet they don't even have a valid reason to do so or treat me like that.

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The tractor next to me on the beach when I came to but I remember getting up to get out its way the night before and like... Dp you comprehend what the next 6 months were like? And my drs with my drug test straight black from the blood or the positive DBT9 which is hardly a recreational drug and like... it's a law that they have to report stuff like that to the police. Maybe if they did or help me handle what happened to me I would've saved myself MAD embarrassment screaming it everywhere. I was the last one to know or remember. WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON FOR REAL? I can't begin to tell you how many laws were broken or the questions it leaves me with as well.

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And some how someone managed to make it all legal too... I'm done going off. I actually had a good day i ruin it all by myself sometimes... trying to quit smoking weed that I started smoking again and changed my mind. I"m not going to sabotage myself cause disability keeps denying me. BUt hey... if you gonna get accused any way.

[A Disciple]

Made Men



“You either gonna be a coward or king”
I didn’t have many options - I can’t sing
Or to bring to life nothing without my left wing
Wish me luck…
Hop in the truck hit 120 to buck and defuse
Water splashes my face cause this is a heart that refuse
Now who gonna use what or who like some muse
You fucked with the wrong bitch… you chose the wrong bitch to abuse
1, 2, 3… Bloody Mary was under in Hail
Now I’m stuck posing like I’m under some spell
Transitioned to coke from weed… less smell but these days it’s all a dog need
And who I feed? No one… not one… but held to many men when holding a gun
What up gangsta? What up dun?
Is it a March to widow - doubt that
But you gonna need more than a little
Cause all I need is 10 seconds to douse back
Take your allowance and say she crack
I mean what kind of ish is that
And nah I can’t swear I got their back
Cause where were they when I got attacked
In fact… I’m a leave you with this though
A snitch made me thorough, a bitch hit my borough,
a rat got me shot, now I’m sitting here just forming a plot
“Made men on some dead president shit”
I really like money… more than a lot 🐸🍭

[A Disciple]

Ok so like when I break down this logically the video camera and cameras I assume be you… so nah I would never go against or press charges but “they can’t say shit you got it all on tape” … so what’s the problem?

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You know my social and birth certificate missing right? That means someone was in my home again and the only one that care about that is me… I told you how someone went to the bathroom and left when we were in New York so like…

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I used to love that song.. “all over a hoe” on the menace to society soundtrack… can’t wait to find out what’s going on and write my own…

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Cause your cover look like I felt that day… running barefoot and all… was that a car that hit me or was I struck by lightening type shit. You all were dead wrong for that! Cause a Spanish lady came in the store I used the phone and was calming down in video recording me and the guy was talking to my ex on the phone like he knew him. I didn’t know who it was I was scared it was taliban!!!! That’s why I wrote my in case they kill me note.

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I got lit the fuck up… finally I stopped running and asked God why… and it all stopped

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That’s why I joke and say if you run you done

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My cards keep saying there is a problem with a project or plan… OBVIOUSLY… and they not going to keep my families divided as a result… sober? EASY!!! Why bother when you won’t get that sick ass hand kissing freak off me! Besides the fact I said PARTY SENSIBLY I’m not ever going 100…

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Maybe there wouldn’t be a problem if people just speak the fuck up… even if my heart is W I’m V first and if you can’t respect that like BYE you can’t be mine or for me

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I just felt my lip and I wAnt to know who… I thought it was my V but then they been using it to abuse me. Did you see how bad they had my face knotted and I noticed my sister still has 3 and like

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The last thing I’m doing is getting married homie… why the fuck that one guy won’t stop asking me? Finally I’m to the point of every time he’s around I get sick and I’m not doing it on any level. I won’t wish him death but stay far away from me… just cause we in the same of 2 baskets doesn’t mean we are anything alike or compatible and I hate to be a bitch but I’m tired of still hearing people that are long gone… some even almost a decade gone!!!!!

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No… I don’t like money THAT much to put myself in a living hell for the rest of my life. I’m trying to get out of hell not put back in it.

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And my mom doesn’t understand why I can’t sleep with or be with a senior citizen but no way in hell either Gma… like no. Hell no!!!! I have a very specific and detailed list of what I can and can’t tolerate and the old man kissing my hands really needs to leave me alone… it’s kinda gross, and desperate, and pathetic and it turns me off and not on.

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Like V or my family watching over especially now that I’m choking and stop breathing in my sleep is one thing… an entire creed of enemies stalking me another - it’s not the same things and they are ALWAYS confused and misread our shit and I’m just like what you even doing here to begin with… you and that was never an option! And then when I pray and hear theirs first like nah you really do have the wrong bitch and I will take this to my god myself if I have to. To make you stop disrespecting me and my religion

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I’m just really upset cause how did you miss the first try to wake up and how I had to hit insanity and got dropped fighting for my head and pinky all night shackled to a chair when THEY HURT ME… so then you go and let them do it again on a how many times stronger and like… what the fuck are they even doing here to begin with after all I found out that was behind my back and like who really expects me to grant that blessing like HELL NO I rather die for real.

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I’m so serious about that I would forsake my own blood if they try to force me to

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Nah that now you see me now you don’t shit? That’s not how or why we don’t remember… not your sick didn’t even know it and from somebody and people so low too?!??? I mean what’s going on for real how does that even happen to begin with?

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They unshackled me and put me in the recliner with blankets 5 minutes before the nurses came on that morning

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Fuck being dropped the insanity was the worst part for real and like

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I know cause I stole the car and then was yelling at the cop… it don’t matter what happen to me prior there is nothing cozy or cute about our justice so like it’s obvious I ain’t even do shit… so what’s the problem make them just leave me alone!!!!

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Laugh and say fuck pire again bitch I swear…

[A Disciple]

Laugh and say fuck pire again bitch I swear…

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Oh that was weird… it was showing I didn’t post that

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If I ever do make money writing we have to fix this “sleep” or they will just sleep walk me into the bank like they did in DMV down south…

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You can check the ATC tapes if they still have them… it was the night before I transported to criminal mental - the same day or night I turned myself in

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I got dropped in the police car too… the one in Durham not the courthouse like - my council don’t play…

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I KNOW I’m not guilty…

[A Disciple]

I’m glad the site is coming back to…

[Candy]

i use for health it took soo long i use to do sport in school but i was too busy trying to get my artist degree that i didnt really use it to maintain any physical desire it was more like im skinny ohh im too skinny now il do more sport and there happy there was even muscle

it wasnt until i left school i joined a couple of gyms and shapped up to the point i knew thats exactly what i wanted to be stop going to the gym and started working on my health rather then my physical appearance because i already reached my peek

you dont need to apologize you rock.. express yourself how you express yourself people are just people

respect lol xoxo i can smell you through those panties

nah im not on instagram i got banned like a week ago i got facebook..

https://www.facebook.com/aaron.batty.7/

[A Disciple]

I see M back in the studio and got good as hell… I sent him a link to this site. I know he has to know something of what’s going on from a comment he made back in the day about switching computers. I saw you at her house and seeing as though I feel the fade of enemies literally inside of me and you haven’t made them stop yet? Like… I know you understand the depths of hell on earth I’ve been dropped to and gone thru and I can’t respect anybody that would make me feel uncomfortable in my own body. Telling people I like it though?!?? I don’t know what to do for real… I’m just venting and stuff. Like I’m worried cause I can’t maintain the grasp that I probably have a daughter and or son out there… and like if you holding here for vioux - we got it over there too

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Shit sorry delete and fix I thought I was on my own thread again @Candy @Emily

[Candy]

hello lil lady

[A Disciple]

@Candy hey… yeah I was tripping again smh… how are you? What’s the weather like over there?

[A Disciple]

Don’t get caught up in your feelings I wasn’t taking shots at you to even begin with… and you just straight mean for real

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I’m not the bitch that’s gonna sit here and go back and forth

[Candy]

the wheather is cool not too hot but kinda shady.. love your avy

[A Disciple]

Thanks… kinda cool in the world probably has 100 different meanings cause my sister was bundled up hoody and all and it was 54 in Florida… here it is 42 and I was too cold in just a hoody. You know my dad went to Australia kinda recently… he said the plane rides and travel was just too long. I feel him… if I wasn’t in business class to London and back I could just imagine… I don’t like to sit still usually.

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@csndy you still feel like writing? What’s the next topic?

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I was feeling less than again so I had to throw my ass shot up… not that I would even try to step or compete with people, and I don’t really want a man either, like… I’m just not feeling or acting much like myself completely in a long time. And I’ve gone thru this before but I’m tired as fuck, I don’t like it, why do I even have to?

[Candy]

topic: your ass

lol yeh im still ready to write

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cool your dad came down my way

i like that your booty shot up, dont take it down too fast i got something to look at xoxo