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Thread: Sprung

  1. #1
    Ars Longa Vita Brevis English's Avatar
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    Sprung

    numb; asleep on a sprung settee,
    I pulled on a string that spun a dream,
    Of white and black - but the scene
    Needed apt colouring,
    The pen and pad’s buggin' me,
    I’m trapped under sheets, black cover-chiefs
    lack other cheeks, to turn.
    toe-tagged & wrapped un-discreet. rap hungrily
    or have your corpse stacked suddenly
    on the point of the map that's thundery.
    fallacy's pathetic, uhm, weak shit. irregular prefix.
    vestibular remix, conceptual edict; letters are scenic,
    expel them in sequence
    with no measure of secret until every key hits,
    as long as the essence’s beating I’m never defeated,
    prick yourself, prick.
    don't fetter thoughts -- better to bleed it.
    gung-ho, love hoes, take that protector. don't need it.
    ode heeded:
    sole phoenix; soul seeded in threads of causation.
    misread for caucasian, wow, fuck a skin tone.
    open doors of perception and see how your kin grow.
    if not: got model ‘87's, akimbo, watch how your wit go
    when the tip glow, that’s Eng yo, king flow with a big nose
    bent in some mad degrees,
    descended from Maccabee's - read upon tapestries,
    extended said faculty to seminal mastery.
    not really semetic. uncertain, actually.
    the feeling's embedded.
    staring at the ceiling's emetic.
    ugh. break it the fuck down!
    uhm. say what you want now:
    how to be love-stricken
    if the heart on my sleeve was missing?!
    Does a thought serve its purpose if the meaning's unwritten?
    i speak in tongues, sequenced, spun, peaceful, sprung rhythm.

    .

    ..

    ...

    fuck you

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  2. #2

    Re: Sprung

    sup eng thanks for the feed man.

    this felt like a really smooth undercover flex piece with some great wordplay. definitely enjoyed that part of it and the phrasing ie. pirck yourslef prick..lool though most may see that as corny...i see that immediately tag it to your personal taste which means your letting me into your world..anytime a writer does that is its plus..soo ++ lol. i dont think ive read a flex piece from you...its a bit strange i guess....good switch though. shows your versatility with the pen bro.

    letters are scenic,
    expel them in sequence
    with no measure of secret until every key hits,
    as long as the essence’s beating I’m never defeated,
    prick yourself, prick.
    this is a great example of your style...greeat wording, rhyming puitting together words that sound alike...yeah...shit was dope man keep posting mang.

  3. #3
    The Legend KnowP's Avatar
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    Re: Sprung

    The pen and pad’s buggin' me,
    I’m trapped under sheets, black cover-chiefs
    lack other cheeks, to turn.
    toe-tagged & wrapped un-discreet. rap hungrily
    or have your corpse stacked suddenly
    Murdered this portion!!!



    don't fetter thoughts -- better to bleed it.
    gung-ho, love hoes, take that protector. don't need it.
    ode heeded:
    sole phoenix; soul seeded in threads of causation.
    misread for caucasian, wow, fuck a skin tone.
    open doors of perception and see how your kin grow.
    On Point!!



    bent in some mad degrees,
    descended from Maccabee's - read upon tapestries,
    extended said faculty to seminal mastery.
    not really semetic. uncertain, actually.
    the feeling's embedded.
    Sick Rhymes!!!!


    DEAD @ fuck & you (shots at me....i thank you tho)



    Overall, this was a dope free flex piece. You went in on the concept which im sure ive never seen before, but i thoroughly enjoyed the spin on the topic and the way you mixed feelings and thought. In some places i felt you just started going off the top with a freestyle, but for the most part stayed on topic and nailed it pretty much with some serious vocab displayed. good piece my brutha. keep dropping these fire bars for the new gen....

  4. #4
    Kami no kotoba. Wordz AhGod.'s Avatar
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    Re: Sprung

    on the point of the map that's thundery

    ^lmao.. it was all dope then I saw this shit and was like WTF?? that line doesn't belong there you asshole haha. good om though, felt like it was topical mixed with battle rap in a way. I fucks with it tho.
    カミノコトバ

  5. #5
    BEST topical writer... Endeva.'s Avatar
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    Re: Sprung

    enjoyed the read... my crit would be with the fluidity of it, but overall decent stuff
    [youtube]99ns8n2S40g[/youtube]

  6. #6
    Ars Longa Vita Brevis English's Avatar
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    Re: Sprung

    werd thx
    @Northern Beggar

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  7. #7
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    Re: Sprung

    wordplay was ....damn thats what i can say each line is like a random stroke of a paint brush with the final outcome being like a grim gothic work of art i reallly like this

  8. #8
    You've Earned a Custom Title! Northern Beggar's Avatar
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    Re: Sprung

    sole phoenix; soul seeded in threads of causation.
    misread for caucasian, wow, fuck a skin tone.
    open doors of perception and see how your kin grow.
    ahhh u bastard! Closest thing i've read to a battle verse from you ha. read this 3 times and enjoyed it a lot, my ninja. U Jewish, Eng?
    [youtube]DmSREFKsZ7Y[/youtube]

  9. #9
    Ars Longa Vita Brevis English's Avatar
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    Re: Sprung

    Quote Originally Posted by Northern Beggar View Post
    ahhh u bastard! Closest thing i've read to a battle verse from you ha. read this 3 times and enjoyed it a lot, my ninja. U Jewish, Eng?
    no, lol. not immediately, anyway. semitic, maybe.

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