User Tag List

Showing results 1 to 13 of 13

Thread: Tears of a Soldier's Wife ft. ~WhiteOut~

  1. #1
    I'm Dope.
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    1,083
    Battle Record
    5-9

    Tears of a Soldier's Wife ft. ~WhiteOut~

    Tears of a Soldier's Wife

    1st verse - ~WhiteOut~
    2nd Verse - Dope Name

    She gave him to her country with a blessing on his head
    She found his name this morning in the long list of the dead..


    Dinner was set, candles lit and wine glasses filled to the brim..
    Expecting him at 5, and at 5:15 a taxi cab pulled in..
    Ringing the doorbell, tears in his eyes, stomach weak, he can barely stand..
    Grasping tight to a Certificate and a Folded flag in his trembling hand..
    Her nerves building up, smile comes about her face and her heart racing fast..
    Unaware that the best memories she'll have w/ him, are the ones of the past..
    Peering out the hole, her stomach drops as she says "oh no"..
    "This cant happen to me, we belong together, he cant go"..
    Handing her the envolope, already moist with his tears..
    Watching as she reads the scripts to her ultimate fears..
    Breaking down, she falls, scuffing her brand new skirt..
    Words of support, he wants to help, all that comes out is "I know it hurts"..
    Weeping in misery, her beauty fleets as her make-up runs..
    Flipping through her photo album, all her desires have come undone..
    Reading and rereading the love letters he sent from time to time..
    One of her only recollections, she frames it, cherishing its sublime..
    Grasping the flag, emotions taking over, now all she has is anger and shame..
    Knelt down next to the fire, shredding the letter and tossing it into the flames..
    Smothering the candles, putting it out like her future with him..
    It all is happening to suddenly, heart break feelings set in..
    Gathering sympathy letters in the mail, but she never sends a reply..
    She wont hear it, only way to cope is pretending that he never died..
    All alone she is left, a new love she is sent out to seek..
    But sorrow has ruined her hopes, she chokes up when ever she speaks..
    Dreading a day where she only has rememberance to cling to..
    No one to cuddle with, and when the cd spins, no one to sing to..



    These hearts were woven of human joys, poise, and cares,
    The years had inclined them with weaknesses, though dawn was theirs
    Washed marvellously with sorrow, rapid clasp, swift to mirth,
    And sunset, shattered by death and the colours of the earth
    These had seen movement, told to be true and heard music, known
    Felt the quick stir of wonder, the beginning; heaven sat alone
    Slumber and waking; loved; left with despair gone proudly friended,
    Beautiful flowers and grass and love, all this has ended
    There are waters blown by dynamic winds, God known as a crafter,
    Grasses lit by the rich skies, aesthetic winds caused laughter
    Frost, with a gesture, guides the smooth waves that dance,
    Unbroken glory, glistening stars gave a gathered radiance
    And wandering loveliness, non-appearance, he leaves a white,
    A width, a shining peace, under the night..
    Scattered souls across the globe, are rotting existence,
    though the stench of the deceased, hygene has became resistant
    Listen to the derelicts, the broken politic speeches,
    read between the lines, you'll see where decievement has became to meet this
    We bow and fold our hands, though tainted republicans see this,
    only one out of 3 soldiers die with no funeral, a sign of bleakness!
    Families become dysfunctional, dismantled, and entangled,
    held by a string burning and screams deafening, over a volcano
    Sacrificed by fire, a bullet pierces not only his chest,
    punctures the heart of his family, just that cant effect the rest
    We're ruined, household silent, sitting at a table quiet,
    while the President is hiding under his desk, secreting himself from a riot
    He's a concealed leader, voters around the world, tear down his throne,
    We could reign hell on these mortals, until law is overthrown
    And as we sleep in serenity, with thoughts of fulfilled dreams,
    Bush smiles with misery......the crescent moon gleams.

    Courageous souls willing to stand tall and defend,
    while the stare and watch their beloved nation come to an end…
    im dope

  2. #2

  3. #3
    Est. 1987
    Join Date
    May 2005
    Age
    37
    Posts
    4,081
    Battle Record
    22-2
    HOT HOT HOT

    Great wordplay, good topic , nice set it up wit the flow n strucutre. the wordplay and topic had me from the start, the verse from both of ya'll was creative and well worded with vocabulary and it even felt like you had experienced this in ya opwn life thats how much scence you made out of it.

    Good everything man , phat drop keep doing ya thang


    9/10

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

  4. #4
    I'm Dope.
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    1,083
    Battle Record
    5-9
    Thanks, more feed please.
    im dope

  5. #5
    NONCENTZ AKA WORD~PERFECT noncentz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2003
    Location
    j-ville florida
    Age
    43
    Posts
    5,352
    Battle Record
    7-14
    i must agree dope i cant say much on this very few flaws and overall great rhyme 9.5/10
    to love something,is to die for it ,if you do, your a martyr , but these days music is morbid, false carters ..prohet's for prophet no lie, look how our last martyr was crucified. to put it in it symplicity, you aint true...you wouldnt sacrifice a few dollars for authenticity..

  6. #6
    I'm Dope.
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    1,083
    Battle Record
    5-9
    Ok, ups.
    im dope

  7. #7
     
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Harrisburg
    Age
    36
    Posts
    4,807
    Battle Record
    18-9
    Thanks for the feed.

    upping
    Roc-A-Fella !

  8. #8
    Banned
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Posts
    562
    Battle Record
    6-3
    This was really good, I liked it. You guys got into the mind of a Soldier's Wife and if was magnificent. I liked it alot! Keep it up.

  9. #9
    I'm Dope.
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    1,083
    Battle Record
    5-9
    bumpety!
    im dope

  10. #10
    Needs a Name Change.
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Inner Sanctom.
    Age
    36
    Posts
    670
    Battle Record
    3-3
    cool ish... upping and upiing once more/

  11. #11
    I'm Dope.
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    1,083
    Battle Record
    5-9
    ....wtf @ people fucking sleeping.
    im dope

  12. #12
    The Topical Juggernaut ITawAPuddyKat's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Age
    34
    Posts
    2,207
    Battle Record
    3-3
    Whiteout- I Liked your verse. It had good wordplays and the emotion was good. The flow was cool and soothe, your vocabulary should be upp a bit, but that don't matter. Your imaginary was ehh alright, not very Much detailed., Just the emotion is what kept me reading your piece, overall-keep writing.


    Dopename- Your verse was the best in this collab and I must say, nice wordplay and your metaphors are decent. I'm loving your flow and your vocab uses is balanced. Your imaginary is what kept me reading. Good writing

    Overall Good Collab.

    To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 50 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.


    ...I don't Go Right. I go Left...

  13. #13
    I'm Dope.
    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Posts
    1,083
    Battle Record
    5-9
    koolio, thanks babe.
    im dope

Similar Threads

  1. Tears of a Soldiers Wife ft. Dope Name
    By "lil Neefy" in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: December 15th, 2005, 10:53 PM
  2. Tears Of A Soldiers Wife.
    By Po' in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: December 10th, 2005, 01:48 PM
  3. ~WhiteOut~ VZ R.E.C.L.E.Z.
    By R.E.C.L.E.Z. in forum Closed Battles
    Replies: 28
    Last Post: November 3rd, 2005, 08:09 PM
  4. true wordz from a soldier to a soldier...
    By Frozen Flayme in forum Open Mic
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: December 12th, 2002, 08:00 PM

Posting Rules

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •