Allied Pen

[Thrust]

In this world...It's like...
we're destined in the same direction
with possesion of the thought's expression
writting elaborated seconds off the clock
sharing the distrubance, ceased by clot
voice contained, ready, but reluctantly refrained
shadowed fame, substantial, but am I pro-claimed?
another stain, accumulative lascerations
this effort, this toll forces me unto probation
weary and delerious, can i be serious?
with wondering eyes, despised, inferior equals us
turn my back on you, and ride my spine
and merge with me when my nerves divine
ruinite and fight against the torn paper
name it a bitch - abuse and rape her

now i've got my grip, a docile instrument
opposing the gauntlet, fire words abolishing predicaments
call it indefinite, then witness as i persist
to puncture capsuls sealed by your very own shit
Insane? maybe - Conniption fit? dead on
relevant to my words indirect path it's prolonged
In this world...It's like...
i've been degraded, whipped, and scorned
i tear the rose because i've been left with thorns
still i'm stuck on I with this pen
because my mind has left yoU out again
we all have similar thoughts then do away with
only purpose served is to display the image

The picture is...The mixture is...
the world is shit and you've all consumed
talked the filth unto me and continued
In this world...It's like
you've pushed the shove and back again
but it's not you, it's the world you're in
i grasp the pen, head back to my room
obscene gestures towards the world...
i won't be seeing you soon.

In this world...It's like...
a memory written on paper.

[un_conscious_one]

now i've got my grip, a docile instrument
opposing the gauntlet, fire words abolishing predicaments

^ i liked this line,


i liked the build up in the beginning and the reasoning in the second stanza. and then last stanza kind of depressing cause seems to be saying theres no point of doing anything planned from the first. "cause the world is shit and you've all consumed
talked the filth unto me and continued"

anyway nice drop

[Thrust]

thanks for the feed.
up.

[Bloom.Quist]

Good.

Felt it strongly.

[Thrust]

up.

[Foreshadow]

Kerr. Nice poem here. Although I didnt really get the concept of this piece all that well. I thought that you had a good flow and in some parts it seemed forced and not so free flowing. You had some real excellent lines in this but I'm not going to quote any maybe you can take time and explain the concepts.

[Prince Escobar]

Damn...i was really feeling this (God i just realized how played that response is)
Your imagery was great and i read this one out loud and it really helped bring your words to life, they sunk in much better with me. The flow was impeccable, as previously stated your imagery was on point but i think the highlight of this piece is how profound it was, my fave lines "In this world...It's like
you've pushed the shove and back again
but it's not you, it's the world you're in
i grasp the pen, head back to my room
obscene gestures towards the world...
i won't be seeing you soon."
that was just dope, no way around it, you worded it well and it read well, good job, stay up Kerr, u know im a fan, 1luv.

[Ever Dream]

My goodness.. this is a one of those poems that you get so into that you find a strength in every comming word. Great job hun! I like this poem a lot because It is a strong poem in my eyes, and it speaks volumes to me. The imagery is wonderful, and the emotion that is put inot this poem is its most apparent feature. You've done a wonderful job with this.



keep droppin
will you please take a look at this poem?

In The Art of Love



....bless