Re: Life is a chess board
Damn, loved this piece... Went wild on the metaphors as you know, i loveeee metaphors! so this piece was like a dream read for me!... I read it like 5 times just to crack the hints and decode it step by step... you took a stupiidddlllyy common topic and brought new light on it... very much the same message as most... but with the twist of how the whole piece was a metaophor and may i say very well placed in every line. The only thing i thing i can flaw personally is at times the flow seemed forced slightly, and the verse transitions were kind of sloppy... just didn't fit as well as maybe it possibly could have... but aside from that, loved the piece. pretty close to perfect in my mind man. You made the piece unique and styled it with an origonal blend of a dark yet informative writing. You really have elevated alot man, as i said, i'm proud young nicca. but i still see some of your word use can be sloppy, which is a trate that may i say has come along way with... you barely do it anymore... you used to just place random lines in the middle of the verse because it fitted with the flow, where as now you take time to place each line to fit the stroy and to continue the story damn near seemlessly. You're a treu story teller bro. And very stylishly done.
Well done man.
Re: Life is a chess board
Re: Life is a chess board
Haha this was all you witness this was your drop in SS werent it but all i can say is that this was awesome man...You had everything down the vocabulary tied the piece and i thought the rhymescheme was simple but very effective lol...i enjoyed how you changed the move each verse and overall this was a very good piece stay up man.
Re: Life is a chess board
yeah nice piece witty. one of the best i seen from you..
imagery layout was great. flow was on - point..........
vocabulary was used dopely....bar delivery was smooth.........
rhymes was cool f'sho. showed good skills on that tip for this shit
emotion seemed to roll.....
ive seen a couple of other chess piece pieces but this is better than ive seen before.
so all in propages on this joint
the shit is hof
check my ish-
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=325818
Re: Life is a chess board
Re: Life is a chess board
yea this was some deep shit =D
i really got touched, and it flowed solid.. the immagery was outstanding for this matter.
and about the skull... hell yea its: chess.. and not checkers.
props.
Re: Life is a chess board
Yep..Wit @ his best pretty much...This piece was flawless..the flow was on point...the concept was very intriguing...and informative....as well...the pic really brought out something extra in the piece...kinda like a mind thing...but overall dope drop....
Re: Life is a chess board
Re: Life is a chess board
Well written piece`
I didn't have a slightest clue who you were.
I just saw your name on WP so I figured I check you out.
I'm certainly impressed.
Keep up the good work.
I'm too lazy to break the piece down for you.
Re: Life is a chess board
I'm an 05 head....so you probably were'nt around when I joined. but yea thanks for the feed dude, it's appreciated
Re: Life is a chess board
Niiiiiceeee. I liked this alot. Dope imagery especially.
I was really impressed by the structure, the way it went from white move to black move. Very creative. :D
Re: Life is a chess board
I enjoyed the read, strong at points and gripping. I thought you did well with the style and components used, a few areas could have had some extra attention. You did a great job, but I think some of the messages you were expressing could have been stronger, but that is just me. I thought imagery was the next thing that shoulkd have been addressed, but that is only in my opinion. Very impressive work, I mean I can see tons of improvement in your abilites here. I think the concept won me over here more than anything else. The scheme you ran with was better than I remember from you in the past. A bit predictable as far as the word choice, but you did lay out an elevated meter in this peice. Not so much complex but a real nice mix. the technical components were there, and laid down in a well thought out manner. I still think you are better than this though. I dropped a chess game type peice here on RB once upon a time ago in poetic scriptures and was excited to read this once I seen the concept you took. Good work bruh...
Re: Life is a chess board
Very effective.
^^^
The use of your words, aswell as the flow and imagery.
This is an impressive piece.
You maintained a flawless flow throughout the piece
with a great choice in words aswell as a smooth transition
as you switched from piece to piece.
Also, just like all other good pieces, the ending was pretty
cool in my eyes, and was a cool way to finish.
Really cool flip on a common topic dude.
Loved the hidden meanings throughout aswell.
Re: Life is a chess board
Thanks to everyone that left feed :D it's very much appreciated