Seasons of Memories:Some wierd shit I had to do for School
The thousands of memories surpass like a winter’s day
A childhood of wonderful times, swept before my eyes
Those days were so special, not a single word could say.
The snow-glazed trees that will weep through time
Tomorrow, as predictable as a formation of an icicle
To ever forget those winter scenes would remain a crime,
As the first snow lands, it leaves the world hidden,
As every child rushes outdoors to search and play
Till they find themselves nearing frost-bitten;
Then return indoors, get warm, and let their clothes dry,
Through the home’s frosty window
Lifeless trees shiver, and wind whistles across the night’s sky,
Towns made up of snow, spending the days with friends,
Each year progresses as a timeless classic,
That will forever continue till a different season ends,
Throughout the winter, each season continues in lust
As it lunges through its final days,
The very last amounts of snow disappear to dust.
Each winter leaves as quickly as it had came,
As simple as a flurry of snowflakes,
Those reminiscent winter days return the same
Beware of messed up flow, cause the crazy bitch made me do it that way...
Re: Seasons of Memories:Some wierd shit I had to do for School
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/show...37#post5345237
ill have my links in a lil bit..
still writin another OM.
Re: Seasons of Memories:Some wierd shit I had to do for School
Re: Seasons of Memories:Some wierd shit I had to do for School
this was decent man nice to see your back at it man this had some decent vocaba nd some nice wordings man but you lacked some what some invision and emotion man.. you were iffy here and there that took some of the creativeness away cus of the off lfow on and off ya know but this was a decet piece though man keep writing and you will get better man definatly.
Pz.
RTF on UNTITLED LINK IN THE SIG.
Re: Seasons of Memories:Some wierd shit I had to do for School
hmmm nice you could tell it was sorted made funny....some lines were rhymed in a funny scheme kinda coo......good discriptions which led to nice imagery...nice vocab fit well with the piece..kinda short tho would have liked to have seen a couple extra lines....
overall iight piece decent tho...stay up..pz
Re: Seasons of Memories:Some wierd shit I had to do for School
ight nice feed guys
uppin.
Re: Seasons of Memories:Some wierd shit I had to do for School
Re: Seasons of Memories:Some wierd shit I had to do for School
Lol. Poem.
That's really all I have to say about this piece. Describing winter and the seasons after it.. Winter mostly. Okay, yeah, but try to add some poetic views onto the imagery. All you did was throw images at us and describe the whole situation, no story line, no real amazing detailed thoughts on the subject itself. Though, you did have some okay imagery throughout the whole piece.
This is definately school material, though.
Peace duke. Keep hitting my writings and I'll keep hitting yours.
I wish you luck on getting better.