Quote:
I can now escape from hell and out of my chamber of doom,
Which was filled with unspoken horrors and touched with subtle gloom,
My mental state was weak as I lived in a dark corner,
Never to be seen,just put there,and left like an old antique,
Many a day I have cried,as my nightmare went on and on,
Each second devestating,crushing my heart and strangling my soul,
People severly abused,killled,battered and raped,
But there was no escape as the walls drew upon you,
Your screams a whisper and your thoughs were nothing,
It may echo through the corridors but nobody will hear you,
You are helpless,you must sit sit through the mind burning pain,
Wait until it is all over and then be ready for it to happen again
you strayed off to how it 'was' and didn't stay on the topic that your free now. then in the end you seemed like you were teaching a lesson of freedom to those who are free, which was ok, but i feel you could have done more with this. i would have liked to see you write in the direction i thought you were going from the beginning, which was telling a story of how you ajust to freedom and how you react to the new opportunities and whatnot. this was ok but you could broaden your horizons with your topics more. keep writing though, its obvious your very talented, Mr. Hall of Famer lol.