Share Your Heart With Me

I just got this copywritten not too long ago I forgot what I used for a title so I just made up another for the sake of this post.

The darkness of your mind is my festering corruption,
It infects my soul like an endless seduction,
Without interruption I touch your voice and thoughts,
I catch your visions before they are sought,
I fought off a breath you just exhaled,
Knowing what its absorption truly entailed,
You ail me with such simple distractions,
Without releasing even the slightest abstractions,
My attraction to you grows with every smile that glows,
From your wonderful being, so I write it in prose,
I compose these words to expose in testament,
A bird's song to your voice isn't a just sentiment,
Commitment may be a fear embedded deep within your heart,
But lend it to me and I affirm mine won't ever depart.

...bump...

nice vocab words. this was more like reading a OM to me than a poetry piece. but you still had nice rhymin concepts also i liied oyur topic, oyu made it undestanding also you had a good structure almost, but just needs to work on taht a little bit mpre nad it will be practically better.
return the feed, thanks
http://www.rapbattles.com/forum/showthread.php?t=238574

NICE PIECE I REALLY FELT THAT
NICE OVERALL. I AGREE WIT Ladie Streets, it was more of a OM then a poetry

9/10